Stay Away from Japanese Bunnies!
by Blood Dark Sun
Summary: America has a confusing encounter in the streets of Tokyo.


_I don't own Hetalia, Ouran or bunnies._

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><p>"Hey, look, everybody! Look at Usa-chan's new necklace!" Hunny bounded into the coffee shop brandishing his stuffed bunny, Mori close behind. Since it was vacation time, Tamaki, Kaoru, Mori and Hunny had decided to hang out downtown. The rest of the club members were busy elsewhere.<p>

"Let me see, let me see!" Kaoru (sporting pink hair this week) came over to look at the heart-shaped pet tag around Usa-chan's neck. Made of platinum, it had 'USA' engraved on it, with a diamond embedded at each of the cardinal points. He flipped it over to see Hunny's name and address engraved on the back, with an etched flower surrounding it.

"Isn't it just so CUTE?" Hunny beamed. "And look, the blue collar has little red and white flowers and bunnies on it!"

"Awww…" Kaoru said. "Usa-chan is the best-dressed."

"Better than Beary?" Tamaki demanded furiously, rising from his seat.

Hunny started to look angry. Before this could escalate, Mori put in, "Let's go outside. Everyone in town wants to see how nice Usa-chan looks."

"Yay! Let's go!"

It really was scary how fast Hunny could mood-swing.

…

"All right, Japan! Now that this meeting's over, I'm going to go walk around Tokyo for a bit and soak up some of your culture. See you tomorrow!" America sprang excitedly to his feet. He was already wearing his bomber jacket, but added a new scarf he'd recently acquired – red, white, and blue, of course. England had told him it was tacky, which America didn't understand – weren't England's colors also red, white, and blue? Pfft, Iggy was too uptight. As if anything America wore could _possibly_ be tacky.

Japan merely nodded, replying pleasantly, "Enjoy yourself, America-san." America bopped out of the conference room and into the streets happily, thinking over the meeting.

Luckily for America, Japan was a good worker, and they never got stupidly sidetracked the way he did with the Western nations. They'd worked out a new trade agreement and tomorrow's meeting was simply to put the finishing touches on it. Then he could go back home! America had a whole afternoon (well, _almost_ a whole afternoon) ahead of him, the day was beautiful, and Tokyo was such an interesting city! There were a lot of vibrant people around. It reminded him of New York.

As he ambled, aimlessly, he began studying Japan's architecture. Much of it was becoming Westernized – especially the skyscrapers – but here and there, more traditional buildings survived. Aw, those little pagodas were so cute! America idly wondered whether Spain had ever been to Japan.

Since he was staring up at the skyscrapers, he bumped right into someone. A _tiny_ someone. "Oh! I'm so sorry!" he said. He looked closely at the small boy, who was hugging a fluffy bunny. "Did I hurt you? I'm sorry; I was just looking at this building." Aww, this kid was so cute, it reminded him of himself, back when England was taking care of him.

The boy looked up – and up – at this foreign man, who was very, very tall. "Apologize to Usa-chan," he barked.

"Uh…what?"

"Apologize to my bunny! You bumped into him!"

"Haha, all right," America said, and crouched down on the sidewalk. Kids were so funny, no matter what nationality they were. "Oh, how cute! He has an American collar." This was certainly cheering! Who knew that Japanese people liked red, white, and blue so much?

"What? It's not American. It's got bunnies and flowers on it!"

"But it's red, white and blue! American colors." Hunny's eyes narrowed at this comment, but America wasn't looking. He fingered the platinum pet tag briefly, which had gotten twisted around. America gently twisted it back into the correct alignment, and then blinked. USA?

"Wow, you're really into America, aren't you?" he asked.

"What are you _talking_ about?" Hunny's expression was visibly darker.

America suddenly found himself surrounded by jean-clad legs. A lot of them. Whoops…He stood up and looked around him. Three big guys, out walking with this little kid? He tilted his head to the side and decided to ignore them for the moment. He really didn't need to get into an argument with some of Japan's people. He turned back to the little kid to explain.

"I just meant, your bunny's name tag says U-S-A. You know. United States of America."

All four of these Japanese guys stared at him.

"What? It's right on his name tag! And anyway, America is _awesome_!" Ugh, he hoped Prussia never found out he'd said that…that sinister albino got _very upset_ if someone else claimed to be awesome. But you know, America _was_ awesome…No, he had to focus here. He had to heroically fix this situation! The little kid seemed to be calming down, so America added, "American bunnies are super-cute."

Whoops.

The boy handed the bunny off to his blond-haired friend and cracked his knuckles. "All right, mister, you're going to be sorry you ever said that!"

Another one of his friends, with bright pink hair (wow, now _that_ was tacky) stepped forward anxiously. "Hunny, Hunny, don't go overboard! Don't do it! It was an accident!" The little one – Honey? – simply growled and stepped back menacingly.

The blond boy started fidgeting and reached a hand out to plead with America. "It's probably better if you just leave right now. Right now! Hunny can be – shall we say – very destructive?"

America stared at this boy, then back at the little one. "You've got to be joking." Haha, come on! He was America! He couldn't be hurt by this little kid!

On the other hand, he really _didn't_ need trouble with Japan's people. And how would it look if this little kid attacked him and –

"OW!" The Honey kid _had_ attacked! And it had hurt, a little. Right. America wasn't about to take this lying down. Er – standing up. Whatever.

He reached out like lightning and picked Hunny up by the back of his collar. Hunny struggled ineffectually; America's grip was tight, and the shirt well-made. For about ten seconds they stood like this, Hunny squirming, trying to hit America's arm, cursing; America simply holding him at arm's length, staring in amusement. All the older boys started backing away from Hunny and America with something like fear on their faces – and then the tallest one checked himself, stepped forward, and gently lifted Hunny out of America's grasp, holding him firmly around the middle.

"Forgive him. He overreacted."

"Shut up, Takashi! Let me at him!" Hunny struggled even harder, but his friend tightened his hold.

"Look, I don't know what's got you all upset," America offered. "I, uh, think your bunny is cute?" Would that be enough of an apology? Ah, he had a brilliant idea! "Here." He removed his new scarf, took the bunny from the unresisting hands of the blond kid and wrapped the scarf around its neck, handing it back to the stunned Hunny. "There! Now he can really be an all-American bunny!"

America rocked back on his heels, beaming, completely satisfied with himself. Hunny, who was still being held fast, looked up at him in amazement.

"Oh, I get it!" he exclaimed, face breaking into a wide, friendly smile. "You're an idiot just like Tama-chan!"

"Hey!" yelled both America and the blond boy, but then America decided discretion was the better part of valor. He'd done his good deed, right? Fostering friendship between Japan and America? Yeah. He smiled and turned his face to the bright blue sky. Time to get away from these kids before anything weirder happened.

"Have a good day! I love your city!" He stepped forward – past the tall guy holding Hunny – and started to walk away.

The tall guy squeezed Hunny around the middle. "Say 'thank you,' Mitsukuni."

"Thank you," Hunny muttered towards America, who simply waved and moved on wordlessly, still grinning.

"But he's _not_ an American bunny!" he heard Hunny yell towards his retreating back.

"It appears he is now," the pink-haired boy snickered.

"Ha ha ha, Beary is now the best-dressed!"

"Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!"

Maybe tomorrow, America decided, he'd simply stay in his hotel room.

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><p><em>Yeah, I always think of Hunny (and to some extent the twins) as the kind of guys who would needlessly spend loads of money on trivial stuff, like platinum-and-diamond tags for stuffed animals. Also, I don't know why Hunny is so anti-American bunnies...they really are cute!<em>


End file.
